“Well, let me just put a stop to this shit right now. You can give me gold-plated day care and an awesome public school right on the street corner and start paying me 15% more at work, and I still do not want a baby. I don’t particularly like babies. They are loud and smelly and, above all other things, demanding. No matter how much free day care you throw at women, babies are still time-sucking monsters with their constant neediness. No matter how flexible you make my work schedule, my entire life would be overturned by a baby. I like my life how it is, with my ability to do what I want when I want without having to arrange for a babysitter. I like being able to watch True Detective right now and not wait until baby is in bed. I like sex in any room of the house I please. I don’t want a baby. I’ve heard your pro-baby arguments. Glad those work for you, but they are unconvincing to me. Nothing will make me want a baby.
And don’t float “adoption” as an answer. Adoption? Fuck you, seriously. I am not turning my body over for nine months of gaining weight and puking and being tired and suffering and not being able to sleep on my side and going to the hospital for a bout of misery and pain so that some couple I don’t know and probably don’t even like can have a baby. I don’t owe that couple a free couch to sleep on while they come to my city to check out the local orphans, so I sure as shit don’t own them my body. I like drinking alcohol and eating soft cheese. I like not having a giant growth protruding out of my stomach. I hate hospitals and like not having stretch marks. We don’t even force men to donate sperm—a largely pleasurable activity with no physical cost—so forcing women to donate babies is reprehensible.”—
"So, reading those three paragraphs above? I bet at some point you recoiled a bit, even if you don’t want to have recoiled a bit. Don’t I sound selfish? Hedonistic? Isn’t there something very unfeminine about my bluntness here? Hell, I’m performing against gender norms so hard that even I recoil a little.
This is actually what I think, and I feel zero guilt about it, but I know that saying so out loud will cause people to want to hit me with the Bad Woman ruler, and that causes a little dread. Why do we feel this way?
What kind of training and socialization did we receive that made us think there’s something terribly wrong about a woman who is hurting no one and is actually pretty nice but wants what she wants in her private life and doesn’t apologize about it? Is there a reason that we should bully women into pretending that they’re more interested in being selfless and eternally nurturing than they actually are, even at great cost to themselves?”
I recently made a female friend who was also willing to admit she wasn’t sure she wanted children and I was so happy because I have never had that conversation with a woman friend before. Just admitting, “Yeah, I don’t think I want children,” is something we aren’t supposed to do. And I had a mother who always supported me in that feeling! She encouraged me to wait, to figure it out for myself, “don’t rush it.” I can’t imagine all these complex feelings also being enhanced by familiar pressure.
“Twenty-one million people with disabilities did not vote,” said [Christopher] Dodd. “That made the disabled communities the single largest demographic group of nonvoters in the United States of America. At that time, only 16 percent of polling places were physically accessible. And not one, not one of the nearly 500 polling locations which the General Accounting Office (GAO) visited on Election Day in 2000, had special ballots adapted for blind voters.”—
My polling place is not accessible (the line to vote goes up an enormous staircase), so I have to use the “special” accommodations instead of voting like everyone else.
But if I didn’t know about that option, I would’ve just turned away. And what about all the people that don’t consider themselves disabled and wouldn’t ask for accommodations but also can’t stand in line for HOURS at a time, either because of their knees or their hearts or their kids or their jobs?
Not to mention these absurd “voter ID” laws that require people of color, poor people, old people, students, and disabled people - disproportionately - to stand in line at the DMV for hours on end just for the “privilege” <ahem shouldn’t it be a right> to vote.
Kitestring is a simple webapp that checks up on you and sends a text message to your emergency contacts if you don’t respond by a designated time.
Enter your ETA and Kitestring will send you a text message to reply to. You can extend your check in time via SMS or check in early. If you don’t respond to Kitestring’s text message, your emergency contact(s) will get your customizable alert message. [x]
“If there was ever a month for you to be an oracle, this is it. The ancient sibyls would sit over caverns from which emanated gases from deep in the earth, speaking strange prophecies, or as Heraclitus put it, “with frenzied mouth uttering things not to be laughed at, unadorned and unperfumed.” These women usually had male priests interpreting their strange pronouncements. You don’t need the cavern or the priest — your magic is yours alone, and comes through your own damn voice. Find your people and start unraveling the mysteries.”—
White privilege is being the #1 consumers of welfare, food stamps, general government aid, and illegal drugs, but STILL blaming POC for all of those things as well as incarcerating them at an exponentially higher rate.
We are both leaving the dog for the first time since we adopted her last year, and I am so nervous! I am trying not to pass my nerves along to Kaya, but I am pretty sure she knows. That girl is reading me like a book. Also she’s never seen me fold all my clothes before. (There’s a dog-sitter staying over and I can’t let her think I am a complete slob — even though I am a complete slob.)